Another Great You-Can-Be-A- file from Brutus Maccabee!
(c) July 11, 1988 {8th day of the Tour de France}

Ok, you’re a normal guy with normal needs. Your girlfriend won’t put out; you
don’t have enough for a whore. Pornos and Playboy just don’t cut it anymore.
You want real live sexual activity before you. Fucking the Dead is one way.
(Someone wrote a file on that didn’t they?) But this way maggots don’t eat your
cock off while you’re a-fucking.
If you live in a large building on a high floor, peeping should be no problem.
All you need to do is find a careless neighbor anywhere in your view from your
window. A young couple who still go at it and walk around the house naked a lot
are prime specimens.
A pre-peeping idea:
Try to carry groceries up for the wife while the husband is at
work. Then while she is going back downstairs, open the shades
in the bedroom and open the window in the bathroom. If they are
careless enough then you should get a good show that night.
Or, try any way to get into the apartment. If you are young and
innocent looking say you are taking some poll or survey. Then do
the thing with the blinds and get ready.
If you’re into illegal shit, why not just break in? And if you
have electronic equipment, set up some cameras in the bedroom or
bathroom or wherever. Also, bug the place to get the full audio
as well.
Ok, you’re ready to peep. At night, if they have the lights on and you have the
lights off, they can’t see your ass at all. Just get out the binoculars and
peep to your hearts content. Of course, when they turn out the lights you
can’t see shit, but they won’t turn them off right away know what I mean? And
they never turn off the bathroom light so if she is a habitual showerer…get
going. If the building they live in is close enough to yours you don’t even
need binoculars. But if you do need them, focus them beforehand because they
are a bitch to focus in the dark. Kitchens are good places to look as well,
because I have found that after a good fuck the wife usually comes out for a
drink and doesn’t bother to re-dress, and the light from the refrigerator
makes her show up very nicely.
Another good place to peep is at the beach. Some of the girls there have so
little on that they’re better than naked because it holds all the flesh in
place know what I mean? Just take out you’re binoculars and pretend that
you’re looking at the sailboats or light houses or some bullshit like that.
Then casually scan the beach! Woah! Awesome! Focus on some asses, you can see
through some of the material at close range.
You can also peep into houses and even onto the beach while hidden in a tree.
Or even while just sittng in a tree where you’re not really noticeable. Always
go pretty high for best affect. (Or is it effect?). If you know a hot girl
well, try to go over to her house and when there open all the shades and blinds
and curtains. Then if someone in her family catches you around the house while
peeping just say you were coming to see her. Ta-da!
Welp, thats all for this presentattion. There are a lot more places and ways
to peep, but I hope you get the general idea!
Special thanks to: All my careless neighbors and all the hot girls on the beach.

This has been a Brutus Maccabee presentation!
Watch for my new X-Rated series:
The Adventures of Betty Bondage and Laura Lust

As they collapsed, ringingly, to the bed, she nuzzled
the warmth of his elusive armpit and sussurrated with the
ecstasy of his glorious odor. “Baby,” she cried out to his
middleaged mass, “infant, child, sexually immature
Homo Sapiens!”
Aroused, he nibbled the fresh sweet hair between her newest
toes. “Oh, how I long for the days when I could gaze hungrily
into your unblinking third eye and be presented with a gift
of mucus!” He attached himself like a schnauzer with lockjaw
to her inner thigh and sucked the marrow from her lust-
crazed bones.
She ran her remaining fingers over the chitinous exoskeleton
of his collapsible love-stick, shifting him into third. Panting
with pleasure, he sniffed her unpulchritudinous vestigial
milk bottles. “Sweetheart, saccharine blood pump, tongue-nerve-
exciting fleshy blood-soaked hydraulic thing, no one, not
even the rain, has such small glands.”
Her blood seething with desire, she sank her angry yellow teeth
into the cartilage of his nose. Nearing his climax, he extruded
a tuning fork from his lower abdomen. As she plonked his G-string,
musical instruments at last sprouted from his erect, bleeding
earlobe. Crying out in pure, bloodthirsty joy, she blew
his trumpet three times.

And the walls came.

–

A few people have chatted to me via private mail, asking
for advice on having sex with animals. I would like to put
down a few pointers for novices. Let’s concentrate on dogs for
this article, as they are the animal of my preference, and
also I think they are the animal most furries will readily have
access to. I will try to explain any jargon I use, but only
briefly, as I don’t wish this to be a technical discourse. If
you need clarification on terms used here, comment to me on
Alt.Sex.Bestiality or check a good ‘Encyclopaedia of Dogs’. I
am also only going to refer to animals that have not been de-
sexed (in the case of males, having their testes surgically
removed. In the case of females, having ovaries removed). I
can’t bear the thought of any animals of mine missing out on
sexual pleasure. Even so, I know in any city dog populations
are too high, and hundreds of dogs are destroyed daily. There
are good arguments for de-sexing, but a responsible owner
should be able to keep an entire animal without accidental
litters (and still keep the animal sexually satisfied!)
Also note that when I refer to dogs, I mean any breed
Labrador or larger. In my mind, anything smaller than a
Labrador isn’t really a dog. If I refer to a ‘Giant Breed’, I
am talking in the category of English Mastiff, Great Dane, St.
Bernard, Irish Wolfhound, Newfoundland, etc. These are REAL
dogs.
The first rule that leaps to my mind is this:- the
animal MUST BE CONSENTING!! If the animal is enjoying the
experience of having sex with you, the sex is so much more
fulfilling. If the animal is not enjoying it, you are
committing rape. If you have to force the animal into
anything, stop. I hope most of us would agree that we are
animal lovers, sharing sex with our animal partners as a gift
of pleasure. Any other attitude toward your animal partner
makes you a loathsome, slimy reptile, unworthy of the status of
a toad. So there.

Let’s start with bitches.
Bitches become sexually mature (depending on the size of
the breed) at around 8-18 months. The larger the breed, in
general, the later they will have their first heat (Oestrous,
the bitch becomes fertile after a 5-7 day period of menstrual
bleeding. Male dogs become insanely attracted to her scent,
and will chew/dig through anything to get at her. This lasts
for around 7 days, followed by another 5-7 days of menstrual
bleeding. After that the bitch is no longer fertile. Her next
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the
English language today is the word “Fuck”. It is one magical word which
just by it’s sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate, and love. Fuck, like
most words in the English language, takes it’s name from another language,
the German word “Friklon” which means “WHOOPEE”.

In language, fuck falls into many grammatical categories. It can
be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive
(Mary was fucked by John), or as a passive verb (Mary doesn’t really give
a fuck). It can be used as an adjective (Mary is fuckin’ beautiful). As
you can see, there are not too many words with the versatility of “Fuck”.

Besides it’s sexual connections, this lovely word can be used to
describe many situations as follows:

Fraud…………….I got fucked by my insurance agents
Trouble………………………I guess I’m fucked now
Dismay………………………………..Oh! Fuck it
Agression…………………………………Fuck You
Passive……………………………………Fuck me
Confusion…………………………….What the fuck
Difficulty……I don’t understand this fucking business
Despair……………………………….Fucked again
Philosophical………………………Who gives a fuck
Incompetence…………………………He’s fucked up
Laziness……………………………He’s a fuck off
Displeasure………What the fuck’s going on around here
Rebellion……………………………Fuck the world

It can be used in descriptive anatomy: He’s really a fucking ass-hole.
It can be used to tell time: It’s fucking’ Five-thirty.
It can be used in business: How did I get this fucking job?
It can be used as a prediction: Oh well, I’ll be fucked.
It can be maternal: Mother-fucker!
It can be nautical: Fuck the Admiral!
It can be political: Fuck the President!
It can open the door to wonderful relationships: Lets fuck, baby.
It can be used to enhance the meaning of a word: Fuckin’ beautiful.

The mind fairly bogies at the many creative forms for this most
functional word. How can anyone be offended when you say “Fuck”? Use it
in your daily speech. It adds to your prestige.

-Tell someone today, “FUCK YOU”
–

A History of an Aberrent Sexual Contest

“Fnorking” is a colloquial term for contests involving females inserting
small dead animals into their vaginas. All known instances involving “fnorking”
have occurred on college campuses. The contests dealt with several females
competing to insert as many animals as possible into their vaginas, the winner
being the one able to insert more than any of the other contestants. The winner
of the contest was sometimes crowned the “fnork” queen.
The earliest known incidences of “fnorking” occurred in the late 1920’s.
The phenomenon seems to have been an outgrowth of the goldfish eating fad
prevalent at that time. Most goldfish eating contests involved college age
males consuming as many live goldfish as possible. The female collegians of
that time were less inhibited than preceding generations of females and
developed their own version of this fad. They held contests involving the
insertion of as many goldfish as possible. The goldfish were most often
inserted while live. Contest were held late at night in college dormitories,
although there is a report of one contest being held in broad daylight beside a
well stocked pond. This contest is said to have involved at least twenty-five
females and the winner was able to “consume” twenty-seven goldfish.
All known “fnorking” contests seem to have been held at exculsively female
colleges and universities, although, considering the segregation of males and
females at schools in this time period, this is not unusual. “Fnorking” seems
to have been an outgrowth of the general loosening of morals in the 20’s era
and the woman’s sufferage movements of the early part of that decade. The less
inhibited females of the era were more inclined to enter such bizarre contests.
As the fad progressed, the contests were not limited to just goldfish but
were expanded to include other specie of small animals. It is known that
contests were held involving the “fnorking” of hamsters, gerbils, lizards,
salamanders, frogs, small birds and even one contest involving chipmunks. All
of the above contests involved dead animals. The preferred method of killing
the animals was suffocation. The contests were held immediately after the
animals were killed because they were “still warm and still very pliable.”
The phenomenon seems to have disappeared after the turn of the decade.
This is possibly because of the depression era when less females were attending
colleges and also morales experienced a general regression. No known incidences
of “fnorking” have been reported until very recent times.
Recent reports have eminated from the Florida area and from Europe,
specifically at the 1991 “spring break” in Florida and one incidence in 1989 in
Denmark involving sixty college age females inserting frogs in a day long
contest. There were reports of three contests in the Miami area in 1991, two
involving insertion of goldfish and one the insertion of small toy stuffed
animals. The winner of one of the goldfish contests was able to insert twelve
fish and is reported to have recieved a cash prize in the amount of five
hundred dollars.
Interview’s of 1920’s era females involved in “fnorking” contests indicate
that no prizes were awarded in the contests, of that period. The females stated
that most entered the contests due to peer pressure. They also indicated that
the contests were held in conjunction with college fraternity initiations.
The origin of the word “fnork” is very hard to discern. All of the females
interviewed stated that “it was always called that.” One woman did offer as an
explanation that “fnork” is formed from the first letters of greek words
describing the activity. At this time I have not been able to discover the
words used, if there are any. No written descriptions of the activity have been
brought to light, although, considering the type of activity, this is not
unusual. All of the females interviewed were very reluctant to admit to being
in the contests.
Considering the recent resurgance of the “fnorking” phenomenon, it is
possible that the general lessening of sexual inhibitions in females in recent
times has allowed the fad to resurface. In this day of personal video, how soon
will some enterprising person make a record of one of these interesting
contests?

–

Without willing it I got up and walked over to her and asked if I could sit
down beside her. She nodded. As I sat down, she looked at me with such
intensity and desire that I almost missed the seat.

After I had sat down she reached over and placed her hand on my thigh. Not
knowing what to do exactly, I put my hand on hers.

Continuing to look at me with desire, she said, “I need someone tonight.
Will you help me?”

I replied, “Sure, what can I do for you?”. Even then I think I already
suspected what she needed.

“Get off at the next stop with me” she said.

We got off at the next stop and walked down the street to a hotel.

She said, “Please check us in and please don’t ask any questions.”.

As I went to check in, I wondered about her desire for a stranger.

As we were going up the elevator she said, “Pretend you’re my lover and this
is our anniversery of our first date. And please, no questions, just play
the part”.

We walked down the hall to the room as lovers would, in each other’s arms,
trying to be as close to each other as possible.

As we got to the room, she said, “Give me a couple of minutes, then I’ll let
you in”. I let her in the room and waited. Five minutes later she called
and I let myself in.

She was moving around the room in pink, almost transparent underwear. The
room was white and pale gray with green fittings in the bathroom. The bed
was broad enough for a whole orgy. The broad windows looked down into the
street where an occasional neon light flashed.

Slowly undressing, I looked at her appreciatively. She moved towards me and
and twirled round in a little pirouette in front of me.

“How’s that”, she asked.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Here is the long awaited story involving Kibo. As previously
discussed, I would have Kibo’s permission to use his name if he existed.
Also, if he existed he would have asked me to cross-post this to the
groups which I cross-posted to.

There is a quiz (Multiple choice) at the end. Please post results
to as many groups as you want.

Zangara’s Elegy

“‘He was a bloody tyrant and we brought him down. And I will not
have history think I did it for a bag of gold or in some kind of rabid
fit!`”
I looked curiously at this disheveled individual who was ranting
what I perceived to be nonsense. I turned to my guide, and hopefully
future employer. “What is he talking about?”
“Oh, he’s no one. He thinks he’s John Wilkes Booth, that’s all,”
came the reply. I looked closer at my guide. I hadn’t really studied
him up to this point. Suddenly however I knew that he posed me no
threat, and so I wished to know more about him.
“‘Tell them how the Union can never recover from that vulgar, high
and mighty niggerlover, Never–!`”
I began going over what I knew about my guide. His name was Dr.
Charles Guiteau, and he was the director of the mental ward of the
University of Massachusetts Medical Center. I knew nothing about his
credentials, but that was not where my curiosity lay. I was interested
in his character, and since it was profession to know other peoples
thoughts, I was able to delve into his inner self even as he showed me
the building.
“Kibo, would you like to join us?” Dr. Guiteau asked the mental
patient. “This is Dr. Sam Byck, and I’m showing him around the
building.”
“My name is not Kibo, it is Johnny Booth. Sure, I’ll come along.
‘Someone slew the tyrant, just as Brutus slew the tyrant`”
“We don’t know his real name, so for a while we were calling him
Johnny. Then the doctor who was handling his case decided it was better
to call him something else. I’m not sure where the name Kibo came from
though,” Dr. Guiteau rambled on. “By the way, if you come on Kibo will
be one of your patients. Dr. Czolgosz, the man who left for Buffalo,
was his doctor.”
I had been half listening to this exchange until Dr. Guiteau’s
last sentence. Suddenly my interest in this specimen was piqued. There
had to be some way of using him to my purposes. “I would be interested
in seeing his file,” I replied, confident that my speech had not skipped
a beat.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

From _Easyriders Magazine_

Cross-country bikers who travel cuntless usually discover that to
leave one nagging problem behind simply leaves a throbbing one in front.
Fortunately, America’s farmlands provide an abundance of domestic live-
stock that can be exploited to reduce the swelling. The biker who uses such
means may know that he is practicing a tradition sufficiently ancient to
have been denounced by Moses.

Unfortunately, sex manuals neglect this dimension of sexual prac-
tice. They tell how it’s done in a dozen countries, of acrobatic positions,
of how to use cunt juice as a sauce for roast squab, but tell nothing of
shagging animals. The following treatise may well be the first of its kind.
Hopefully, this pioneer work will stimulate public discussion of animal-
fucking. Perhaps someone will initiate a monthly journal devoted thereto,
complete with centerfolds, advertisements for helpful apparatus, and a
question-answer column (which the author hereof, being the only one quali-
fied, volunteers to write). Further, the author hereof swears on a greasy
chop manual that the lore presented herein has been gathered from years of
attendance to the discourse of plowboys, mule-skinners, swineherds, chick-
en thieves, and others of like ilk, well qualified to instruct. Henceforth,
no biker should begin a cross-country run without taking this copy of Easy-
riders along for guidance.

Given the brevity of this guide, only the rudimentary procedures
appropriate to common domestic livestock can be outlined. Exotic foreign
species such as the yak or alpaca and wildlife such as bears and moose are
excluded, as are dogs, these topics deserving treatises to themselves.

To consider cows first. Cows are basically nervous. They’re like
the prick-teasers of the 50’s who would bat their eyelashes, lean over to show
their boobs, flounce their skirts to show a beaver, and then shriek like
hell if some bothered dude tweaked a tit. Cows can be attracted by a handful
of cottonseed meal, a piece of bread (preferably whole wheat), even a bunch
of grass. They will hang around, switching their tails to show off their
cunts, then get jumpy and run off as soon as the cow-screwer gets serious.

Therefore, to fuck a cow requires that it be immobilized, a fact long
recognized in rural architecture. As long as milkmaids did the milking, it
was done in the open, the cow being kept in place by a bucket of eating
goodies. With the development of large dairies, men took over and the barns
built to shelter milking were cleverly contrived to assist cow-screwing.

The cow was headed into a stall, its head locked in a stanchion, and
hobbles added according to the disposition of the cow and the agility of the
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Adler: The task of human parents is to enhance the spiritual
life of the next generation by planting the seed of spirit in
their own child.

Al-Tirmidhi: Man is humble only when the flaming fire of desires
has become extinct. Al-Tirmidhi

Aristotle: Desire is accompanied by pain.

Avoid the inclination to animalistic pleasure, for it
stains the soul. Do not yield to the desire for sexual
intercourse. What glory is in following the actions of animals?
Sexual intercourse involves the destruction of our bodies, the
shortening of life.

Thomas Aquinas: Plato based his moral system upon the
distinction between the bodily or sensual and the spiritual part
of our nature.

Marcus Aurelius: In the degree in which a man’s mind is nearer to
freedom from all passion, in that degree also it is nearer to
strength.

Besant: Only when pleasures have been banished, then there comes
upon us a boundless joy that is firm and unalterable.

Jacob Boehme: Lust is an abomination, whether it be in the state
of wedlock or out of it. Marriage based on lust is as immoral as
free love.

Buddha: Freedom from lust; this truly is the highest happiness.

Cut down the whole forest of lust! When you have cut
down every tree and every shrub, then you will be free! Buddha I
proclaim the annihilation of lust. I teach not the extinction of
everything, but the extinction of lust. One need not have his
mortal body die to avoid the clutches of concupiscence.

Edward Carpenter: Sex today is slimed over with the thought of
pleasure.

Cervantes: Tell me thy company, and I’ll tell thee what thou art.

Clement of Alexandria: The mortal shall put on immortality when
trained to everlasting chastity.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Working from the recollections of depraved minds and an antiquated
version of the test, soon was created the 576 point test.
A mere five hundred seventy six? This would not do!
So over the months was cobbled together the Ultimate Purity
Test – field tested and guarenteed to be nosier that your
parents, more invasive than the census, and containing something
to offend everybody.

And for a brief time only, we’re including an answer form so that
you can remember where in the test you were, or show to a friend.

Enjoy:
———————————————-

Perverts Anonymous Qualification Exam
Ver 2.2.75 12:38:34.88 14.IIII.90

On the whole, this is biased for experience and, hence, age. If
you’re still too young to qualify, well, these things take time.
Remember: the conjugation is “I am erotic, You are kinky, They are perverts”
Definitions: (for the innocent, naive, or too busy)
Necking: the kissing or stroking of a persons head or neck, the
stroking of arms hands or back.
Petting: the above plus the caressing or fondling of other portions
of anatomy; through or underneath clothing.
Sexual activity: all of the above, plus what your puerile imagination
dreams up.
Posslq : “person of the opposite sex sharing living quarters.”
Bureaucrat for live-in lover.
Most of all, this is entertainment. Have as much fun in the taking
as was had in the making.
And yes, technicalities count.
————————————————————————-
I Good Clean, ‘Wholesome’ Activities
have you:
1.hugged somebody?
2.kissed a friend or stranger as a friendly gesture?
3.kissed a friend or stranger as an unfriendly gesture?
4.held hands with someone?
5.been on a date?
6.been on a date past one a.m.?
7.stood someone up?
8.dated someone on a regular basis?
9.slam danced?
…End of the part1. To be continued..

THE UNISEX, OMNISEXUAL
P U R I T Y T E S T
_______________________________________________________________________________
Version 4.0 (500)
Final Release
23-Apr-1988
_______________________________________________________________________________
Public domain; no copyright. All rights wronged, all wrongs reversed. Up with
going down. The risen flesh commands: let there be love. Murphy’s law on
sex: Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics. Chaste makes
waste. Virginity can be cured.

This document was not sponsored by the Department of Defense Advanced Research
Projects Agency, and was not monitored by the Air Force Avionics Laboratory.
The views and conclusions contained in this document should not be interpreted
as representing the official policies, either expressed or implied, of the
Defense Advanced Projects Agency or the US Government. Neither should it be
interpreted nor inferred that the authors/contributors have actually performed
any of the actions contained herein.
_______________________________________________________________________________

Disclaimer of Liability

The user of this test acknowledges that sex is a hazardous sport; that a person
must copulate in control, and use good judgement at all times; that partners’
conditions vary constantly and are greatly affected by weather changes and
previous use; and that dirty sheets, variations in terrain and bed surfaces,
spouses/pimps/managers, forest growth, rocks and debris, clothed obstacles, and
many other natural and man-made obstacles and hazards, including other users
and customers, exist throughout the bedroom area. Personal managers
(pimps/spouses) and sado-masochistic operations and equipment are constantly in
use and may be hazardous to those not copulating in control. Impotence,
collisions, and social diseases resulting in injury can happen at any time,
even to those copulating in control with proper sexual equipment. Inherent
risks are part of the sport and may exist within your partner. As a condition
of being permitted to use the facilities of your partner, the user of this test
agrees to copulate in control and within the limits of his/her ability, and
further acknowledges and accepts these hazards, dangers, and risks and assumes
the risk of injury or loss to person or damage to property which might result
from use of the partner’s facilities.

As a further condition of being permitted to use the facilities of your
partner, the customer understands and agrees that: (1) in the event of a
transfer of use by another or anything else in the management’s opinion is
misconduct, misuse, kinky, impotence, or nuisance, this service may be revoked
…End of the part1. To be continued..

The Purity Test

Answer YES or NO to the following 100 questions. At the end of the test,
total up the number of NO answers. This is your score. The higher the score,
the ‘purer’ you are.

All questions pertain to men and women not related to you, unless otherwise
specified.

I.

Have you ever:

1. Had a cigarette?
2. Had alcohol?
3. Tried pot or hash?
4. Tried stronger drugs (coke, acid, shrooms, etc)?
5. Thrown up from alcohol?
6. Kissed a woman?
7. Kissed a man?
8 French kissed a man?
9. French kissed a woman?
10. Put your tongue in someone’s ear?
11. Had someone put their tongue in your ear?
12. Fondled a woman’s breast, or had your breast fondled?
13. Put your mouth on a woman’s breast, or had it done to you?
14. Seen a nude man?
15. Seen a nude woman?
16. Had telephone sex?
17. Undressed a man sexually?
18. Undressed a woman sexually?
19. Been sexually undressed?
20. Fondled a man’s genitals?
21. Fondled a woman’s genitals?
22. Had an orgasm?
23. Climaxed from a partner’s fondling?
24. Brought a partner to climax thru fondling?
25. Performed fellatio?
26. Performed cunnilingus?
27. Climaxed from oral sex?
28. Brought a partner to climax thru oral sex?
29. “Finger-fucked”?
30. “Dry fucked” (with all your clothes on)?
31. Bathed or showered with a man?
32. Bathed or showered with a woman?
…End of the part1. To be continued..

+——————-+
! What Hypnotism Is !
+——————-+

Hypnotism, contrary to common beleif, is merely state when your mind and body
are in a state of relaxation and your mind is open to positive, or cleverly
worded negative, influences. It is NOT a trance where you:

o Are totally influencable.
o Cannot lie.
o A sleep which you cannot wake up from
without help.

This may bring down your hopes somewhat, but, hypnotism is a powerful for
self help, and/or mischeif.

+———————–+
! Your Subconcious Mind !
+———————–+

Before going in further, I’d like to state that hypnotism not only is great
in the way that it relaxes you and gets you (in the long run) what you want,
but also that it taps a force of incredible power, beleive it or not, this
power is your subconcious mind. The subconcious mind always knows what is
going on with every part of your body, every moment of the day. It protects
you from negative influences, and retains the power to slow your heartbeat
down and stuff like that. The subconcious mind holds just about all the info
you would like to know about yourself, or, in this case, the person you will be
hypnotising. There are many ways to talk to your subconcious and have it talk
back to you. One way is the ouja board, no its not a spirit, merely the minds
of those who are using it. Another, which I will discuss here, is the pendulum
method. Ok, here is how it goes. First, get a ring or a washer and tie it to
a thread a little longer than half of your forearm. Now, take a sheet of paper
and draw a big circle in it. In the big circle you must now draw a crosshair
(a big +). Now, put the sheet of paper on a table. Next, hold the thread
with the ring or washer on it and place it (holding the thread so that the
ring is 1 inch above the paper swinging) in the middle of the crosshair. Now,
swing the thread so the washer goes up and down, say to yourself the word “yes”
Now, do it side to side and say the word “no”. Do it counter clockwise and say
“I don’t know”. And lastly, do it clockwise and say “I dont want to say.”
Now, with the thread back in the middle of the crosshair, ask yourself
questions and wait for the pendulum to swing in the direction for the answer.
(Yes, no, I dont know or I dont wanna say…). Soon, to your amazement, it
will be answering questions like anything… Let the pendulum answer, dont try
.. When you try you will never get an answer. Let the answer come to you.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

This is a Guide written by one of my friends, BeastBoy. I hope you
find it informative… Constructive comments welcomed. All flames
will go to /dev/null…

A Guide to Selecting a Female Animal for Fun and Friendship

Copyright 1993 BeastBoy
All Rights Reserved

INTRODUCTION

I have often been asked by the would-be bestialist: “What kind
of animal is the best?” A lot of the answer, of course, is
personal taste, but many guys have little or no experience, and
have no knowledge on which to base an opinion. An ideal
situation would be to have one of each to experiment with, but
in this day and age, few can have a place to keep farm animals,
and fewer still can keep a selection of them. Therefore, I
have written this paper, in which I will share some insights
gained over more than 35 years of making love to animals of all
common species. My opinions are my own, of course, but perhaps
the information here will help lead you in the right direction.

First there are some important things that are common to all
animals:

WHERE TO GET YOUR ANIMAL

If you live in an area where you can have farm animals, there
are bound to be one or more livestock auctions nearby. If you
decide to attend, get there early and inspect the possibilities.
A lot of this is just gut feel, since you will not likely get
close enough to touch them. If you are going to bid on an
animal, select one that has a sleek coat, bright eyes and an
alert posture. A lot of auction animals have not been treated
very well in their life, so they will be suspicious of humans
and may be difficult to train.

The best place to buy livestock is from a breeder. The cost
will be higher, but you will be able to better evaluate the
animal and find out something about her history. You will be
able to get a “hands on” inspection, so be sure to briefly get a
…End of the part1. To be continued..

There’s no other line of “work” as pleasurable and as
overflowing with opportunities to enjoy luxury, travel
and riches as that of the gigolo. And believe it or
not, today it is easier than ever for a man to enjoy
life as a gigolo!
To become a successful gigolo and enjoy the benefits of
this kind of life, you must develop and project the
proper way of thinking. There’s a great difference
between a “male prostitute” and a gigolo.
The male prostitute makes himself available to all
women of all ages, generally concentrating on bored,
frustrated and “exploring” housewives looking for extra
loving as well as variety to satisfy their sex needs. This
type of woman is very easy to spot, and even easier to take
to bed. It makes of a lot of, and a variety of beautiful
sex, but it’s all for free. You have to know precisely how
to cultivate these women to start, and then get them to
continue paying you for each time you “service” them — not
just the loan of a few dollars — which you never intend to
pay back — but $50 or $100 plus expenses for each tryst
you arrange with them.
The gigolo concentrates his efforts on making himself
available to widows and wives of busy businessmen who
really don’t care what their wives do, so long as they
don’t become emroiled in a public scandal. These women
range in age from about 45, on into their 80s.
So the first thing you’re going to have to do is stop
looking for ladies at or about your own age. Dress
yourself more neatly, more stylishly, and begin
“hanging around” the places these women frequent.
You’ll find very few in church! Those that you do find
in church will want to possess you, and somehow or
other steer you to the altar. You’ll find most of them
in night classes at your local college; in
self-improvement, self-awareness, and new life-style
classes; and of course, in all the better class supper
clubs and hotel type lounges.
Relative to evening college courses and
self-improvement discussion groups — these are your
easiest and most fertile “hunting grounds,” because
psychologists long ago proved that the basic reason for
adult enrollment in self-improvement programs is
directly related to a person’s need to be loved. All
you have to do is understand this basic fact, and make
yourself available to fulfill the needs of the women
…End of the part1. To be continued..

A NOTE FROM THE SYSOP:
Bubbles will add to this as she continues “researching”. Much of her info
is from customers and other girls (2nd hand). For legal reasons,
please consider the following as fiction, for entertainment purposes
only, and any resemblances to persons either living or dead is
a figment of your perverted, deranged, and crudely warped imagination.
******

Last updated 1/07/89

Well, those anal retentives in Santa Cruz have done it again. I
went down there looking for work, and not a single massage parlor
is still open! To add insult to injury, “Elan,” my favorite place,
is now a Gospel Bookstore. Sheeeeee-it! Oasis has its sign painted
over, there’s a padlock on the Stairkase and every phone booth I
went to had the “massage” page razored out of the yellow pages.
Sounds like someone wanted to get re-elected Sheriff real bad.

*******

BANGKOK MASSAGE, Larkin and Eddy, San Francisco is a pretty
good place to get laid. The massage is only $30, and the
girls will go all the way for another $50. They’ll even put the
whole thing on your bank card. Despite the name, most of the
girls are Vietnamese or Chinese. Rooms have private baths, and
if you’re lucky the girl will bathe you before and after the
massage. Ask for a “hard” massage, and you will get a nice
legitimate rub, which turns erotic and light-touch after about
15 minutes.
*****
SINGAPORE SPRINGS, O’Farrell street, San Francisco. This is one
block uphill and one block East of Bangkok. Here the girls are
all Vietnamese, massage is $30, rooms all have private baths,
and “tips” are very affordable. A nude hand job can be as low
as $30. There are some very pretty young girls here, but also a couple
of old tarts. Again, a hard massage soon turns into a hard-on massage.
These folks prefer their tips in cash, though.
*****
Sunnyvale’s best kept secret is Hiyashi Massage. The address is
1240 Wolfe Road, but it is cleverly hidden in a small shopping
center just off El Camino. Also, there is NOTHING on the outside
to even hint it might be a massage parlor. The front looks like a
high-class nail salon, and the sign says “Body beautiful tan tone.”
When you walk in the door, there’s a long, narrow waiting area, like a
beauty parlor. But the only services available on the menu are half-hour
…End of the part1. To be continued..

The purpose of this list is to provide you with explanations
for many of those strange acronyms you see in ILink so you
don’t have to write a lot of “What does that mean?” messages.

AA Alcoholics Anonymous
AAA Travel club
AAAAA Travel club for alcoholics
ADN Any Day Now
AFAIK As Far As I Know
AWGTHTGTTA? Are We Going To Have To Go Through This Again?
B4N Bye for Now
BAMF Bad Assed Mother F-
BBS Bulletin Board System
BIOYIOP Blow It Out Your I/O Port
BRB Be Right Back
BRS Big Red Switch
BTA But Then Again (in response to IOW)
BTW By The Way
CU See you
CUL See you Later
CUL8R See you Later
DIIK Damned If I Know
DILLIGAF? Does It Look Like I Give A F-?
DL or D/L Download, transmit to you
DTRT Do The Right Thing
EOT End Of Thread (i.e., don’t reply to this message)
ES&D Eat S- and Die
FISH First In, Still Here
FITB Fill In The Blank_________
FUBAR F-ed Up Beyond All Repair
FWIW For What It’s Worth
FYDITM F- You Directly In The Mouth
FY&TSYRIO F- You And The Sysop You Rode In On
FYI For Your Information
G Grin (as in )
GAFIA Get Away From It All (as in drop out of ILink for a bit)
GD&R Grinning, Ducking & Running
GH Getting Hard (see GW)
GIGO Garbage In, Garbage Out
GIWIST Gee, I Wish I’d Said That
GLGH Good Luck and Good Hunting
GW Getting Wet (see GH)
IC I See
IDTT I’ll Drink To That!
IITYWIMIWHTKY If I tell you what it means, I will have to kill you
IITYWIMWYBMAD If I tell you what it means, will you buy me a drink?
…End of the part1. To be continued..