Archive for the ‘cumswap sluts’ Category

Archive-name Miscellpure-001501

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009

Archive-author:
Archive-title: Purity Test – 1 Question

================================================================================

THE UNISEX, OMNISEXUAL
P U R I T Y T E S T

_______________________________________________________________________________

Version 5.01 (1)
Final Release
11-September-1989
_______________________________________________________________________________
Public domain; no copyright. All rights wronged, all wrongs reversed. Up with
going down. The risen flesh commands: let there be love. Murphy’s law on
sex: Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics. Chaste makes
waste. Virginity can be cured.

This document was not sponsored by the Department of Defense Advanced Research
Projects Agency, and was not monitored by the Air Force Avionics Laboratory.
The views and conclusions contained in this document should not be interpreted
as representing the official policies, either expressed or implied, of the
Defense Advanced Projects Agency or the US Government. Neither should it be
interpreted nor inferred that the authors/contributors have actually performed
any of the actions contained herein.
_______________________________________________________________________________

Disclaimer of Liability

The user of this test acknowledges that sex is a hazardous sport; that a person
must copulate in control, and use good judgement at all times; that partners’
conditions vary constantly and are greatly affected by weather changes and
previous use; and that dirty sheets, variations in terrain and bed surfaces,
spouses/pimps/managers, forest growth, rocks and debris, clothed obstacles, and
many other natural and man-made obstacles and hazards, including other users
and customers, exist throughout the bedroom area. Personal managers
(pimps/spouses) and sado-masochistic operations and equipment are constantly in
use and may be hazardous to those not copulating in control. Impotence,
collisions, and social diseases resulting in injury can happen at any time,
even to those copulating in control with proper sexual equipment. Inherent
risks are part of the sport and may exist within your partner. As a condition
of being permitted to use the facilities of your partner, the user of this test
agrees to copulate in control and within the limits of his/her ability, and
further acknowledges and accepts these hazards, dangers, and risks and assumes
the risk of injury or loss to person or damage to property which might result
from use of the partner’s facilities.

…End of the part1. To be continued..

Archive-name Miscellosjgtxt

Saturday, October 24th, 2009

Archive-author:
Archive-title: Official Strip Joint Guide

==================================
THE O.S.J.G.(tm)
THE OFFICIAL STRIP JOINT GUIDE(tm)
==================================

THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO GENTLEMEN’S ENTERTAINMENT

ELECTRONIC SHAREWARE EDITION

Volume 1, Number 2

THE OFFICIAL STRIP JOINT GUIDE(tm)

This edition is the abridged electronic version of THE
O.S.J.G.(tm) and contains information on over 250 clubs in the
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Archive-name Miscellfemfucktxt

Friday, July 31st, 2009

Archive-author: Dick Ramcock
Archive-title: How to Get a Female to Let You Fuck Her!

In today’s society, it is relativly easy to get laid, but it does
always help when you have a GAME-PLAN! This is what I am about to offer
you, A planned way to get your prick into a female’s virgina (cunt).

Getting a woman to willingly drop her pants for you is not what would
be classified as an easy task, but the ultimate result of a warm and wet
pussy snuggly wrapped around your throbbing cock is certainly well worth
your most earnest effort!

First, Don’t bother trying to go after the most popular or the best
looking female in your life! That Bitch already has every stud in the world
trying to BANG her… Search out a plain looking female who looks like she
would be flattered by attention… This does NOT mean to pick a female who
is not worthy of your attemtion.

The selection of the TARGETED female is your initial step in the
procedure!

THE INITIAL ENCOUNTER AND COURTSHIP

Your selected Bitch should possess the following traits: She should
have an out going personality, a friendly smile and fairly large tits! She
should be very limited in The Dating Game, and she should not have a
current boyfriend. After all, this isn’t a lesson on how to pick up a Bimbo
or a common whore! This is a lesson on how to PREY on a young and innocent
female! You now want to show an interest in this female. Start out by
smiling at her when-ever you see her… After a few days, if you don’t
already know what her name is, BUMP into her by accident, and act
embarrassed, but keep smiling at her when you do this… Then take this
oppertunity to introduce yourself to her by exchanging names, and be sure
to compliment her that ‘She is one of the most attractive females that you
have seen in months!’

an interest in! (CHEAT! Find out one of her interests and study up on it!)
After all, this is the female that you have decided that you want to FUCK!
Now start SWEET TALKING your target! Mention to her that you heard that she
is also interested in WHATEVER! She will jump at this chance, unless you
are a FUCKING DORK, and then you should have gone after the DOG that looked
she should be BARKING AT THE MOON!

BREAKING THE ICE

…End of the part1. To be continued..

Bus Driving Experience

Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009

In my last year of high school, I was a school bus driver. I didn’t drive
in the morning, but our high school let out at 2:30, so I drove junior
high kids home when they got out at 3. For most of the year, it was just
a job, but I had some fun, too.

In addition to being a normal, sex-crazed teenage male, some of the young
ladies who rode my bus sent my mind in a whirl. Because I was small for my
age, most of the ninth-grade girls, with their wide hips and flashing eyes
seemed kind of threatening to me. They sometimes tried to come on to me,
but it only emphasized how they thought I was their age.

I tended to fantasize more about the younger girls, to whom I apparently
appeared to be more a “grown-up.” I got a kick out of these younger
girls’ giggly flirting, especially because I was too shy to ask out
girls my own age. And I sometimes got a hard-on from glancing in my
rear-view mirror as they squirmed to talk to their friends and gave
me an unimpeded view of the well-filled panties underneath their
little-girl skirts. little-girl skirts.

One girl whom I remember was simply exceptional. Her name was Angie.
A seventh-grader, she was small for her age, too, without only a hint
of swelling in the front of her blouse or tee-shirt. From the very
first day, she always sat on the front seat, to the driver’s right. I
dropped her off at one of my last stops before taking the bus back to
the high school parking lot.

I tried to speak to all the kids as they got on and off the bus, but,
because she sat beside me, Angie and I chatted often. I found out her
father had moved to town for a one-year assignment, so she had few
friends at school. Besides, she said, they would be moving away again
as soon as school was over. In addition, Angie had gone to some kind
of advanced program where she lived before, so she was only twelve,
a year younger than the other seventh-graders.

Throughout the nine months I drove her, Angie and I talked about all
kinds of things — what we got for Christmas, local events, favorite
television shows. We talked a lot about our futures and interests.

Angie wanted to be a model and a dancer. She had the elfin build
and pixie features that would have made her a terrific model. Her
dark-blonde hair was cut with bangs in front and was long in the
back. She sometimes wore it in some kind of fancy braid, but mostly
in a simple pony tail. Because she liked wearing short skirts, I
was able to tell her she had great legs for her prospective dancing
career. Whenever I said something personal like that, she smiled
and blushed.

…End of the part1. To be continued..

Archive-name Miscellbgbb0992txt

Monday, April 13th, 2009

Archive-author: Bwana DePervert
Archive-title: Bwana’s Guide To Bouncing Boobs

LOOP Premium Graphics – Chicago
“America’s Breast BBS”
(708) 675-LOOP / @1992
BGBB0992.ZIP

DA FILE

The filename, BGBBxxxx.ZIP, is formulated to make future versions
(if any) easy to identify; BGBB = Bwana’s Guide Bouncing Boobs;
xxxx = mth/yr (0992). I’d like to say this concept is original,
but unlike the list itself, it’s not!

DA BACKGROUND

What started as a user request developed into this. It is by no means
a complete list of BOUNCING BOOB VIDEOS, but it does catalog a good
cross section of flicks (and principal performers) that are for the
most part still available through video outlets and manufacturers.
The videos listed here are either R- or X-rated. Additionally, they
are rated either 3 or 4 (4 being highest) on Bwana’s Personal Rating
System, which is based largely on erotisism and is purely judgemental.

DA LIST

4-STAR RATING:

Between My Breasts: #05 – Nichole Reed; C Starr; La Dawn; Raven
Between My Breasts: #09 – B Belle; C Love; T Roche; L Topp
Big Boob (Lingerie) Party – D Jordon; Georgina; Karen; Sheilagh; Madeline
Big Boobs: #02 – Toni, Maxine, Zoe, Georgina, Five More
Big Bust Babes: #01 – C Samples; R Brewer; R Pedon; M Monroe; Yum Yum; Doreen;
Big Busty: #02 (Busty Nymphos) – L Sands; A Ample; C Nelson; S Fox/R Court;
Bert; Mary Ann
Big Busty: #10 (Breast To Breast) – M Rae; C Canyon; K Stewart; Ursala
Big Busty: #22 – Nicole Reed; Tami; Angela Parker
Big Busty: Best Of Big Busty: #01 – K Stewart; L Sands; M Rae; G Reeves;
C Canyon; A Owens; C Kane; B Alton;
Karen Wing; A Sprinkle; C Nelson;
A Ample; Donna; K Nativadad and Debra.
Big Busty: Ten Years Of Big Bust: #01 – L Sands; K Stewart; C Nelson; N Reed;
B Bell; S Owens; E Duchi; C Samples;
M Rae; C Cane; D Jordon; Karen; P
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Archive-name Miscellzangaratxt

Saturday, February 28th, 2009

Archive-author:
Archive-title: Zangara’s (Kibo) Elegy

Here is the long awaited story involving Kibo. As previously
discussed, I would have Kibo’s permission to use his name if he existed.
Also, if he existed he would have asked me to cross-post this to the
groups which I cross-posted to.

There is a quiz (Multiple choice) at the end. Please post results
to as many groups as you want.

Zangara’s Elegy

“‘He was a bloody tyrant and we brought him down. And I will not
have history think I did it for a bag of gold or in some kind of rabid
fit!`”
I looked curiously at this disheveled individual who was ranting
what I perceived to be nonsense. I turned to my guide, and hopefully
future employer. “What is he talking about?”
“Oh, he’s no one. He thinks he’s John Wilkes Booth, that’s all,”
came the reply. I looked closer at my guide. I hadn’t really studied
him up to this point. Suddenly however I knew that he posed me no
threat, and so I wished to know more about him.
“‘Tell them how the Union can never recover from that vulgar, high
and mighty niggerlover, Never–!`”
I began going over what I knew about my guide. His name was Dr.
Charles Guiteau, and he was the director of the mental ward of the
University of Massachusetts Medical Center. I knew nothing about his
credentials, but that was not where my curiosity lay. I was interested
in his character, and since it was profession to know other peoples
thoughts, I was able to delve into his inner self even as he showed me
the building.
“Kibo, would you like to join us?” Dr. Guiteau asked the mental
patient. “This is Dr. Sam Byck, and I’m showing him around the
building.”
“My name is not Kibo, it is Johnny Booth. Sure, I’ll come along.
‘Someone slew the tyrant, just as Brutus slew the tyrant`”
“We don’t know his real name, so for a while we were calling him
Johnny. Then the doctor who was handling his case decided it was better
to call him something else. I’m not sure where the name Kibo came from
though,” Dr. Guiteau rambled on. “By the way, if you come on Kibo will
be one of your patients. Dr. Czolgosz, the man who left for Buffalo,
was his doctor.”
I had been half listening to this exchange until Dr. Guiteau’s
last sentence. Suddenly my interest in this specimen was piqued. There
had to be some way of using him to my purposes. “I would be interested
in seeing his file,” I replied, confident that my speech had not skipped
a beat.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Archive-name Miscellpure-rk100

Saturday, July 5th, 2008

Archive-author: Texas A&M
Archive-title: Purity Test – Roadkill

The reader hereby is warned that roadkill games can be dangerous; not
all that appears dead is dead; not all scents can be removed by normal
means (ie, soap and water); not many of those who are weak of heart or
stomach can truly enjoy roadkill games, and attempt to do so at their
own risk of O’spurt-ing; not all roadkill is suitable for all things
contained herein, and discretion must be used in what one attempts to
do with a given piece of roadkill; not many states have laws
specifically banning roadkill games, but most judges and juries will
not think twice about locking up and throwing away the key on anyone
who can be shown to have participated in roadkill games; roadkill can
carry odd diseases; odd diseases can be passed between two or more
people engaging in roadkill games with the same piece of roadkill; not
all roadkill can be trusted when it says “I have it covered”; not all
roadkill is natural, some roadkill is manufactured and placed on the
road for tourist’s viewing pleasure by local governments (case in
point: the number of armadillos one can see as roadkill on any given
day in Texas far exceeds any estimations of the living population on
the previous day); not all roadkill is suitable for consumption; not
all roadkill will go with “basic black” pumps; not all people consider
roadkill a topic for polite conversation; not all parties can be
livened up by bringing along your own roadkill; not many people
consider roadkill an appropriate housewarming gift; not all roadkill
enjoys being roadkill; not all universities have roadkill
organizations that can tell you where the really good roadkill is and
that can inform you of local laws and customs in the area of roadkill
(start your own, today!); not many hunting magazines consider roadkill
eligible for “best kill” competitions; not many people read all of
these conditions, but all are held to have if they read later portions
of the test, and therefore the authors are not libel in any way,
shape, or form for anything that happens to a reader because of having
read the Omnisex, Roadkill Purity Test, unless of course something
GOOD happens to the reader, in which case we demand 40% off top–
contact the law firm of Grinch, Evil-anti-Grinch and Assoc., College
Station, TX, 77840, for payment instructions.

_______________________________________________________________________________
The Roadkill Purity Test is a blatant plagiarism of the original Purity Test,
and therefore we shall list its history as the history of this test.

Original Style Purity Test Genesis/History:

Version 1 (100) Created at MIT-1@aker House. Two parallel versions; one for
male, and one for female. Not much is known about this
version. It was ported to CMU by ps in 1982.
Version 2 (247) Spring 1983 – CMU/jb, pd, kr, ps, ts, mt, et al.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

The Coming Storm

Tuesday, March 11th, 2008

It was hot that day, like dog’s breath in your
ear. The sun sat squarely above us as we walked
hand in hand down the dirt road that bordered
Hank’s field. Off to the west came the distant
rumblings of an approaching storm. “How much
further is it?” I panted. We’d been walking for
nearly an hour and I was ready to drop. “We’re
almost there shooga,” she replied. This girl was
something else, country born and country bred.
Her yellow halter top and cutoff shorts did
everything but hide the luscious body under them.
I had to have her, I was hopelessly in love.

She stopped beneath the overhanging limbs of an
old live oak and sat on one of the drooping branches.
I sat next to her and felt her slide ever so slightly
in my direction. Sherry was her name and she was truly
fine. Beautiful through and through with a gorgeous
personality to match that incredible figure. I watched
her pull up her hair and fan her neck. A little drop
of sweat tiptoed down her neck and stood just above
that first hint of cleavage. Another joined it and then
another until together they ran into that moist valley
beneath her top. She saw me staring and giggled, goosebumps
rising from her flawless skin. “It’s just around the
corner shooga, why the fuss?” “I’m so hot,” I spat, “let’s
get the hell outta here and go swimmin’, O.K.?”

She stood up and stretched, then pulled the denim shorts
away from her thighs. Without a word she walked on without me.
Where she got this energy I’ll never know but all it did was
make me love her more. The storm rumbled again closer now.
Maybe it would cool things off. I followed her down that
dusty road toward a distant grove of trees.

I’d been seeing her now for about a month. We had a lot
of things in common and our sex life was coming along
nicely although we hadn’t yet gone all the way. She was
a paradox. So eager to get things going, so passionate
and warm at first and then suddenly cold like the cold
wind before a storm. My hands knew her every curve and
my lips knew her secret places. I could only hope that
I wouldn’t have to wait much longer. As it came nearer,
so it faded away.

She reached the trees long before I did and by the time
I stumbled into the shadows she was undressed. Her skin
…End of the part1. To be continued..