==================================
THE O.S.J.G.(tm)
THE OFFICIAL STRIP JOINT GUIDE(tm)
==================================

THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO GENTLEMEN’S ENTERTAINMENT

ELECTRONIC SHAREWARE EDITION

Volume 1, Number 2

THE OFFICIAL STRIP JOINT GUIDE(tm)

This edition is the abridged electronic version of THE
O.S.J.G.(tm) and contains information on over 250 clubs in the
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Somehow my brother had managed to score some dope of the kind
that I hadn’t seen around in almost 5 years. We’re talking KILL.
ER. MTV was on but the sound was off. Howard pulled out some
papers. We were sitting cross-legged, on the carpet, in front of
the tv.
“Screw that,” I said. “Grab the bong.” He did.
I filled it, but just enough for one good hit. That Wilson
Philips song ‘Hold On’ came on.
“All right,” said Karen, as I took the first hit. “Quick top
ten list.”
“Topic?” asked Howard.
“Top ten things heard at a Wilson Philips party, after Chynna
and Wendi have gone outside to make out with their boyfriends.”
I half-laughed, half-choked, and passed the bong to my
brother.
“Excellent,” I said. “Number 10–Such a pretty face.”
Karen said, “9–a great personality.”
My brother scored big with “She writes *all* the songs you
know.”
But Karen topped it with “Brian was the most talented.”
Karen did her hit and I said “She was a champion swimmer in
grade school, you know.”
“What number is that?” asked Karen, whose eyes were already
mere slits.
“Number two–,” said Howard, “Where’s Chynna. Where’s
Wendi?”
“All right,” I said. “And the number one thing overheard at
the Wilson Philips blah blah blah–” Howard drummed a little on the
carpet. “Got any blow?”
“Careful,” I said, as the bong teetered precariously from the
encouragement of my brother’s foot.
Howard was the first to say it. “I am stoned.”
“How much of this did you get?” asked Karen.
“Just an ounce. Should last for a while at this rate.”
This was clearly true.
“Mariah Carey,” said Karen, who then stuck her finger down her
throat. The ‘Emotion’ video was on. “Turn the sound up, How,” I
said.
“You don’t *like* her, do you?” asked Karen.
“Gimme a break. I just wonder if she hits those notes on her
back, too.”
“Figures.”
“Wait,” said Karen, her eyes opening suddenly. She turned the
sound down on Mariah. “I’ve got an idea. I’ve got to say it now,
because I only think of it when I’m stoned, you know?”
…End of the part1. To be continued..

There’s no other line of “work” as pleasurable and as
overflowing with opportunities to enjoy luxury, travel
and riches as that of the gigolo. And believe it or
not, today it is easier than ever for a man to enjoy
life as a gigolo!
To become a successful gigolo and enjoy the benefits of
this kind of life, you must develop and project the
proper way of thinking. There’s a great difference
between a “male prostitute” and a gigolo.
The male prostitute makes himself available to all
women of all ages, generally concentrating on bored,
frustrated and “exploring” housewives looking for extra
loving as well as variety to satisfy their sex needs. This
type of woman is very easy to spot, and even easier to take
to bed. It makes of a lot of, and a variety of beautiful
sex, but it’s all for free. You have to know precisely how
to cultivate these women to start, and then get them to
continue paying you for each time you “service” them — not
just the loan of a few dollars — which you never intend to
pay back — but $50 or $100 plus expenses for each tryst
you arrange with them.
The gigolo concentrates his efforts on making himself
available to widows and wives of busy businessmen who
really don’t care what their wives do, so long as they
don’t become emroiled in a public scandal. These women
range in age from about 45, on into their 80s.
So the first thing you’re going to have to do is stop
looking for ladies at or about your own age. Dress
yourself more neatly, more stylishly, and begin
“hanging around” the places these women frequent.
You’ll find very few in church! Those that you do find
in church will want to possess you, and somehow or
other steer you to the altar. You’ll find most of them
in night classes at your local college; in
self-improvement, self-awareness, and new life-style
classes; and of course, in all the better class supper
clubs and hotel type lounges.
Relative to evening college courses and
self-improvement discussion groups — these are your
easiest and most fertile “hunting grounds,” because
psychologists long ago proved that the basic reason for
adult enrollment in self-improvement programs is
directly related to a person’s need to be loved. All
you have to do is understand this basic fact, and make
yourself available to fulfill the needs of the women
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the
English language today is the word “Fuck”. It is one magical word which
just by it’s sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate, and love. Fuck, like
most words in the English language, takes it’s name from another language,
the German word “Friklon” which means “WHOOPEE”.

In language, fuck falls into many grammatical categories. It can
be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive
(Mary was fucked by John), or as a passive verb (Mary doesn’t really give
a fuck). It can be used as an adjective (Mary is fuckin’ beautiful). As
you can see, there are not too many words with the versatility of “Fuck”.

Besides it’s sexual connections, this lovely word can be used to
describe many situations as follows:

Fraud…………….I got fucked by my insurance agents
Trouble………………………I guess I’m fucked now
Dismay………………………………..Oh! Fuck it
Agression…………………………………Fuck You
Passive……………………………………Fuck me
Confusion…………………………….What the fuck
Difficulty……I don’t understand this fucking business
Despair……………………………….Fucked again
Philosophical………………………Who gives a fuck
Incompetence…………………………He’s fucked up
Laziness……………………………He’s a fuck off
Displeasure………What the fuck’s going on around here
Rebellion……………………………Fuck the world

It can be used in descriptive anatomy: He’s really a fucking ass-hole.
It can be used to tell time: It’s fucking’ Five-thirty.
It can be used in business: How did I get this fucking job?
It can be used as a prediction: Oh well, I’ll be fucked.
It can be maternal: Mother-fucker!
It can be nautical: Fuck the Admiral!
It can be political: Fuck the President!
It can open the door to wonderful relationships: Lets fuck, baby.
It can be used to enhance the meaning of a word: Fuckin’ beautiful.

The mind fairly bogies at the many creative forms for this most
functional word. How can anyone be offended when you say “Fuck”? Use it
in your daily speech. It adds to your prestige.

-Tell someone today, “FUCK YOU”
–

Growth Possibilities for 1989/90

Understanding is the key issue. The majority of people are
repressed into believing that they are sexually fulfilled
and happy and therefore they don’t need to explore all
those interesting little thought that creep into their
subconscious. They play these ideas of experimentation off
and write off their curiosity to “weird stuff”. Others
recognize their interests, but because of guilt, learned
reaction/shame they shun these experiments. Others learn
to enjoy their pleasures alone, and feel ALMOST totally
fulfilled via masturbation, but fear the possibility of
contact. In 1989, it is my fondest desire that the word
spread concerning Erosian Theory and Practice. There is a
huge audience out there that hides in the closet, jerking
and occasionally venturing out. Erosian Theory is ready
for them. If as you read this, you feel like I am speaking
to you, then I am. ETAP is not a sensation or a good
excuse to get laid. ETAP is a fundemental way of life and
looking at the physical sexual creatures we are and
learning to enjoy that. Whatever your orientation, ETAP
will carry it, as long as it adheres to the Code of
Conduct. If you know that you enjoy sex for sex’s sake, if
you want to learn and explore without fear, without guilt,
then read, study and live this practice. Contact the
electronic bulletin board that this document is produced
on, and leave the author more information. A final release
of this info will include an address where you can write
to obtain more info. The most important things to remember
are: if interested, get involved. If not, stay away. We do
not, can not, and will not take the time to fight
detractors and idiots who cannot understand that we don’t
want to change their world, just our own.

In terms of growth, this document and the accompanying
documents will be archived and uploaded to multiple adult
bbs’s all over the country when complete. In my home town
of Tampa, FL. I am waiting and looking for others to read
and embrace this holistic approach to a comfortable free
thinking sexually full and busy existance. I would be
happy to see 3 cities develop a full scale three Temple
system in twelve months, but in honesty I must believe
that many small groups will form in many areas.

Who is the target of this document? Swingers, lurkers in
bookstores, horny folks everywhere. If you have grown
tired of no sex, or tired of sex that’s weak, sloppy and
meaningless, look towards ETAP.

Above all, if you read this document,and desire the
structure and development discussed here, then you must
contact me for more. DON’T LET IT JUST SIT AND FESTER!
If you contact me and find that you are not interested,
then simply drop it. There is no money involved, no
mailing lists to worry about. If you are interested in
knowing more, this is the most absolutely easy way
possible to learn.

My dream is that some day you will be able to feel
comfortable in the knowledge that in your city there are
50 to 100 Erosians with desires and feelings similar to
yours, and that a phone call can elicit a kind word,
sexual actions, new ideas or support for what you want to
try by yourself or with another.

–

1. You can throw the critter off your bed and they come right back
when you call em.

2. You don’t have to appologize if you cum in less than 3 hours.

3. They come in more colors than just black white red and yellow.

4. They consider cum a delicacy.

5. They don’t argue with you.

6. They don’t buy shit from the avon lady.

7. They think a herd of critters is better than just one.

8. You won’t catch any terrible diseases if he screws the bitch on the corner.

9. They already HAVE fur coats.

10. The don’t mind sleeping in the wet spot.

11. Animals don’t write e-mail flames.

12. Animals don’t divorce you and take half of your life.

14. Diamonds are a girl’s best friend. A man’s best friend is his dog.

15. Animals can’t talk.

16. Animals can’t spell “mysogynist”.

17. Animals don’t drive.

18. Animals aren’t offended by the words “bitch” and “pussy”.

19. Animals don’t tell lies.

20. Animals will forgive you for being human.

21. An animal, when it’s horny, will let you know.

22. Animals don’t know what lawyers are.

23. Animals don’t call you a chauvanist pig when you hold the door for them.

…End of the part1. To be continued..

Here is the long awaited story involving Kibo. As previously
discussed, I would have Kibo’s permission to use his name if he existed.
Also, if he existed he would have asked me to cross-post this to the
groups which I cross-posted to.

There is a quiz (Multiple choice) at the end. Please post results
to as many groups as you want.

Zangara’s Elegy

“‘He was a bloody tyrant and we brought him down. And I will not
have history think I did it for a bag of gold or in some kind of rabid
fit!`”
I looked curiously at this disheveled individual who was ranting
what I perceived to be nonsense. I turned to my guide, and hopefully
future employer. “What is he talking about?”
“Oh, he’s no one. He thinks he’s John Wilkes Booth, that’s all,”
came the reply. I looked closer at my guide. I hadn’t really studied
him up to this point. Suddenly however I knew that he posed me no
threat, and so I wished to know more about him.
“‘Tell them how the Union can never recover from that vulgar, high
and mighty niggerlover, Never–!`”
I began going over what I knew about my guide. His name was Dr.
Charles Guiteau, and he was the director of the mental ward of the
University of Massachusetts Medical Center. I knew nothing about his
credentials, but that was not where my curiosity lay. I was interested
in his character, and since it was profession to know other peoples
thoughts, I was able to delve into his inner self even as he showed me
the building.
“Kibo, would you like to join us?” Dr. Guiteau asked the mental
patient. “This is Dr. Sam Byck, and I’m showing him around the
building.”
“My name is not Kibo, it is Johnny Booth. Sure, I’ll come along.
‘Someone slew the tyrant, just as Brutus slew the tyrant`”
“We don’t know his real name, so for a while we were calling him
Johnny. Then the doctor who was handling his case decided it was better
to call him something else. I’m not sure where the name Kibo came from
though,” Dr. Guiteau rambled on. “By the way, if you come on Kibo will
be one of your patients. Dr. Czolgosz, the man who left for Buffalo,
was his doctor.”
I had been half listening to this exchange until Dr. Guiteau’s
last sentence. Suddenly my interest in this specimen was piqued. There
had to be some way of using him to my purposes. “I would be interested
in seeing his file,” I replied, confident that my speech had not skipped
a beat.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Adler: The task of human parents is to enhance the spiritual
life of the next generation by planting the seed of spirit in
their own child.

Al-Tirmidhi: Man is humble only when the flaming fire of desires
has become extinct. Al-Tirmidhi

Aristotle: Desire is accompanied by pain.

Avoid the inclination to animalistic pleasure, for it
stains the soul. Do not yield to the desire for sexual
intercourse. What glory is in following the actions of animals?
Sexual intercourse involves the destruction of our bodies, the
shortening of life.

Thomas Aquinas: Plato based his moral system upon the
distinction between the bodily or sensual and the spiritual part
of our nature.

Marcus Aurelius: In the degree in which a man’s mind is nearer to
freedom from all passion, in that degree also it is nearer to
strength.

Besant: Only when pleasures have been banished, then there comes
upon us a boundless joy that is firm and unalterable.

Jacob Boehme: Lust is an abomination, whether it be in the state
of wedlock or out of it. Marriage based on lust is as immoral as
free love.

Buddha: Freedom from lust; this truly is the highest happiness.

Cut down the whole forest of lust! When you have cut
down every tree and every shrub, then you will be free! Buddha I
proclaim the annihilation of lust. I teach not the extinction of
everything, but the extinction of lust. One need not have his
mortal body die to avoid the clutches of concupiscence.

Edward Carpenter: Sex today is slimed over with the thought of
pleasure.

Cervantes: Tell me thy company, and I’ll tell thee what thou art.

Clement of Alexandria: The mortal shall put on immortality when
trained to everlasting chastity.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

_______________________________________________________________________________
THE UNISEX, OMNISEXUAL
P U R I T Y T E S T
_______________________________________________________________________________
Version 3.5A (400)
Final Release
13-Apr-1985
_______________________________________________________________________________
Public domain; no copyright. All rights wronged, all wrongs reversed. Up with
going down. The risen flesh commands: let there be love. Murphy’s law on sex:
Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics. Chaste makes waste.
Virginity can be cured.
This document was not sponsored by the Department of Defense Advanced Research
Projects Agency, and was not monitored by the Air Force Avionics Laboratory.
The views and conclusions contained in this document should not be interpreted
as representing the official policies, either expressed or implied, of the
Defense Advanced Projects Agency or the US Government. Neither should it be
interpreted nor inferred that the authors/contributors have actually performed
any of the actions contained herein.
_______________________________________________________________________________
N O T I C E
Disclaimer of Liability
The user of this test acknowledges, understands, and agrees that sex is a
hazardous sport; that a person must copulate in control, and use good judgement
at all times; that their partner’s condition vary constantly and are greatly
affected by weather changes and previous use, that dirty sheets, variations in
terrain and bed surfaces, spouses/pimps/managers, forest growth, rocks and
debris, clothed obstacles, and many other natural and man-made obstacles and
hazards, including other users and customers, exist throughout the bedroom
area. Personal managers (pimps/spouses) and sado-masochistic operations and
equipment are constantly in use and may be hazardous to customers not
copulating in control. Impotence, collisions, and social diseases resulting in
injury can happen at any time, even to customers copulating in control with
proper sexual equipment. Inherent and other risks are part of the sport and
exist in your partner. As a condition of being permitted to use the facilities
of your sex object, the user of the partner agrees to copulate in control and
within the limits of his/her ability and further acknowledges and accepts these
hazards, dangers, and risks and assumes the risk of injury or loss to person or
damage to property which might result from the customer’s use of the partner’s
facilities.
As a further condition of being permitted to use the facilities of your
partner, the customer understands and agrees (1) that in the event of a
transfer of use by another or anything else in the management’s opinion is
misconduct, misuse, kinky, impotence, or nuisance, this service may be revoked
without refund; (2) that the partner is the property of the harem and, upon
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Without willing it I got up and walked over to her and asked if I could sit
down beside her. She nodded. As I sat down, she looked at me with such
intensity and desire that I almost missed the seat.

After I had sat down she reached over and placed her hand on my thigh. Not
knowing what to do exactly, I put my hand on hers.

Continuing to look at me with desire, she said, “I need someone tonight.
Will you help me?”

I replied, “Sure, what can I do for you?”. Even then I think I already
suspected what she needed.

“Get off at the next stop with me” she said.

We got off at the next stop and walked down the street to a hotel.

She said, “Please check us in and please don’t ask any questions.”.

As I went to check in, I wondered about her desire for a stranger.

As we were going up the elevator she said, “Pretend you’re my lover and this
is our anniversery of our first date. And please, no questions, just play
the part”.

We walked down the hall to the room as lovers would, in each other’s arms,
trying to be as close to each other as possible.

As we got to the room, she said, “Give me a couple of minutes, then I’ll let
you in”. I let her in the room and waited. Five minutes later she called
and I let myself in.

She was moving around the room in pink, almost transparent underwear. The
room was white and pale gray with green fittings in the bathroom. The bed
was broad enough for a whole orgy. The broad windows looked down into the
street where an occasional neon light flashed.

Slowly undressing, I looked at her appreciatively. She moved towards me and
and twirled round in a little pirouette in front of me.

“How’s that”, she asked.
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Several times her hand drifted to his right thigh to punctuate a remark or
just to indicate her readiness for their planned outing. How often he’d
teased and cajoled her over the past several weeks both in messages and by
phone. Words like ’star- crossed’ and ‘destiny’ had leaped, rather than crept
into their many conversations, and she felt it to be true. They couldn’t
avoid being together, at least briefly. There was no sense of needing to be
hasty in their actions, just a feeling of fate needing to be yielded to.

They were intrigued by each other in ways neither had experienced in a long
time. Their conversations were sprinkled with puns and innuendos and much
laughter. He frequently accused her of littering his office floor with
innuendos which she countered by saying the cleaning staff should take care of
them adequately.

There was both a level of comfort and the excitement of the unknown which
surrounded them today. They had slept together only once in a somewhat
sterile hotel room, the previous night. But the experience was totally
fulfilling for each of them. They had performed as lovers but also played in
bed like puppies; exploring and frolicking joyfully.

She stretched in the passenger seat with a cat-like abandon and he again
admired the curve of her breast as it pushed the knit top to new contours.
Even dressed in jeans and hiking boots she had a stately quality mixed with
the enthusiasm of a child. What an enigma she was!

And had he been able to read her thoughts he would have realized she felt much
the same way about him. Watching his hands on the steering wheel she
reflected back to the pleasurable way he had touched her body and memorized
the feel of her skin. Looking at his neatly trimmed beard reminded her of the
way it tickled her thighs as he kissed his way up her legs and beyond. He had
certainly mastered her quickly, knowing just where and when to apply butterfly
kisses to increase her already elevated level of desire for him.

Their sexual union began under the guise of being a backrub of course. How
often is that technique used the world over? But it was a pretense they were
content to play out.

Their choice to be together today was also a ruse. Each acknowledged it was a
spontaneous decision. But that didn’t explain why he’d packed the
appropriately needed items before leaving his home in Massachusetts, nor why
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Excerpt from GOOD VIBRATIONS: THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO VIBRATORS by
Joani Blank. Copyright 1989 by Joani Blank. Published by Down
There Press, P.O. Box 2086-BS, Burlingame CA 94011-2086. Available
at your favorite bookstore or by sending $8.00 (includes postage
and handling) to the publisher.

Once Upon A Time…

I walked a few times past the department store salesclerk who was
eagerly demonstrating the big blue and white massager. “On sale -
– only $19.50 today,” she said. Although I had heard about sexual
uses for electric vibrators, I couldn’t justify spending twenty
dollars just to try the massager for masturbation. So I turned my
back and asked her to hold the whirring machine to a chronically
tight spot on my right shoulder. The massager was stronger than
any I’d ever felt. The low speed produced a deep throbbing
sensation. The high speed was so fast it either tickled or hurt,
depending on how it was touching me. It hurt my shoulder so good
that I bought it without further hesitation. At the time, and for
some weeks later, I didn’t even try masturbating with it.

Up until then, the only way I had masturbated was with my hand,
occasionally using an object in my vagina at the same time. I had
inserted the handle of my electric toothbrush into my vagina,
enjoying the gentle vibrations and warmth, but it had not
occurred to me to use it on or near my clitoris. Within moments
after I held the new blue and white vibrator to my clitoris, I
experienced the most intense orgasm of my life. Although it was
all over before I knew what was happening, I saw great potential
for pleasure in my new toy.

My partner and I, being yard sale and flea market fanatics,
started to collect “antique” and just plain old vibrators and
massagers at every opportunity. After a couple of years, we had
acquired more than thirty treasures. At first, I tried
masturbating with every one and found, to my delight, that all of
them, regardless of size, shape, or intensity of vibration, gave
me orgasms. We kept them amid the jumble of their own cords and
loose attachments in a fabric suitcase under our bed.
Periodically we would haul out the suitcase, untangle a few, and
plug them in for our friends to giggle or marvel at. Some went
out on loan and never returned.

…End of the part1. To be continued..

Erosian Theory and Practice
David P. Thomas

Introduction

It is my purpose to create a text on the values and
practices of Erosian Practice, a study and method of life.
The term Erosian is coined from the Greek god Eros, who
was the male deity worship for sexual prowess. It is also
where modern society has coined such words as erotica and
erotic. I am the sole creator of Erosian Theory, and I
encourage others to study and add to my works. If you have
any comments, additions or questions I can be reached via
E-Mail on the Tampa based bulletin board, The Dojo,
286-4297. Leave E-Mail to David Thomas.

Many people will say when they initially study this text
that it is foul, profane, obscene, dirty, pornographic and
much worse. If you feel this way then this study is not
for you. Please feel no offense, and merely discard your
copy.

Definitions and Guidelines

Erosian Theory was created by myself in order to
categorize, define, and dignify sexual practice. Erosian
Theory can coincide well with standard love/relationship
practice. Erosian Theory is not a swing/swap club, nor is
it designed to be a matchmaking service. All of these
organizations are supported by Erosian Theory, however,
Erosian Theory is a way of thinking, a philosophy, not a
club.

Erosian Theory came into being at the time I recognized a
feeling of comfort involved in my own sexuality. Most
adults will feel to a certain degree comfortable with
standard practice sexuality, including but not limited to
hetro/hetro and homo/homo sexuality. However, it is well
documented that for most individuals to recognize comfort,
they must form meaningful relationships which extend into
the realm of love, commitment, family, ect. Those who
avoid such commitment often lack the required or desired
sexual contact. With Erosian Practice however, we justify
and validate the need and right for sex gratis sexis or to
coin an art term, sex for sex’s sake!
…End of the part1. To be continued..

The Temple of Eros

Erosian Handbook and Lifestyle Guide

April 1989

Table of Contents

1. Erosian Theory and Practice

A. Introduction
B. Definitions and Guidelines

2. Erosian Ritual

A. Disclaimer & Notes
B. Foreward…Erosian Rituals
C. The Induction Ritual
a. The Ritual
b. Appendix A – Inductee Preparation
c. Appendix B – Attendant Preparation
d. Appendix C – Temple Preparation
e. Appendix D – Ceremony of The Fluids

D. The Initiation Ritual

E. The Succession Guidelines

3. Erosian Structure and Hierarchy

A. Erosian Structure
B. Erosian Hierarchy

4. Erosian Codes and Guidelines

A. Erosian Code of Conduct
B. Erosian Code of Practice
C. Sexual Practices and Guidelines

5. Erosian Theory Development & Notes
A. Questions and Answers about ETAP
B. Call to Fellow Erosians
C. Erosian Doctrine #1 (Communications)
D. Treatise of The Physical Self
E. Notes & Misc. Information

–

Found the following test for tantric partner compatability. Basicly
the two partners are supposed to take copies of the test separately, then
exchange papers and study the results, followed by discussion. It is
supposed to give you insight into your partner’s sexual attitudes and
such. I thought I would pass the test on:

1. When I see a sexually attractive person I am
a) aroused b) interested c) cool.

2. I try to find out that person’s reaction to me
a) right away b) in the course of our first meeting
c) at some future time.

3. If the person is interested I
a) deliberately engineer our next meeting
b) hope our next meeting will occur soon
c) wouldn’t go out of my way to find out when we might next meet.

4. When we do meet again I
a) make a strong play b) make my continued interest apparent
but not obvious c) play it cool

5. To keep a person interested in me sexually I keep the sexual
motif in dress, conversation and gestures
a) strong b) subtle but constant c) underplayed.

6. Friendship between a man and a woman
a) always has a sexual base b) is usually sexual but may be platonic
c) becomes sexual only if one of the two gives it a sexual bias.

7. If a peron of the opposite sex made a tactful, but obvious, sexual
proposition I would be
a) flattered b) flustered c) insulted.

8. I can have a satisfying sexual relationship
a) without love b) only if I pretend that I am in love
c) only if I am in love with my sexual partner.

9. Even though my physical capability may decrease with age I
believe that my sexual interest will
a) increase b) remain roughly what it is now c) diminish.

10. When I look back at my teen years I
a) feel I’m far more sexually alive now b) know I have still
…End of the part1. To be continued..

(c) Neil Bernstein 1993

One Sunday, driving Dolores’ truck back from a provisioning
trip, Pete stopped along the riverbank to watch a crew of panting
scullers labor their way against the current. Their slender craft
slipped around chunks of floating ice smoothly as a ballbearing
sliding down a greased track. Got all the time they need to do
that, he thought bitterly. Men who could go home to adoring wives
and get up the next morning to go to work.
In Lombard’s General Store he met old John buying feed for his
three geldings. The man’s belly nearly split his overalls as he
carried the sacks out to his car. Pete hid a chuckle.
“You come back for coffee now,” John bellowed.
Pete could see no reason to refuse him. He followed John’s
rusty truck up a series of gravel paths, shook hands with his
pretty wife. John eased himself into a great armchair. He bade
her serve them their coffee and an endless succession of snacks:
toast, honey, ham sandwiches, spiced drumsticks, maple candies,
pear cobbler…
When she was done serving she settled back on a kitchen stool
and nursed her baby. Pete watched her play with the suckling,
bouncing him gently on her knee. He knew, feeling the certainty
only the superstitious know, that it could not be John’s child.
John had been a carpenter for twenty years. One morning he
found the work too exerting and gave it up violently, pitching his
toolbox through the window of the house he was building. He tried
a variety of jobs after that, settling on delivering the Weekly
Argus. He sat long hours alone at the head of his kitchen table,
playing solitaire late into the night, gaining ten pounds a year.
He always left a half-finished puzzle set up in the living room.
Pete remembered the last time he’d been out to John’s house.
A selectman was giving Grandpa Goosehair some problems, badmouthing
him in town meeting. The old man wanted Pete to see if John could
dig up any incriminating tax information. John looked over
everyone’s tax forms, considered it his neighborly duty. He got so
he could do the arithmetic so quickly that everyone brought him
their crumpled forms: farmers who could only read with a certain
pair of spectacles they’d lost years and years ago, folks who could
read Latin but couldn’t be bothered with figures.
Pete’d got himself lost on nameless gravel tracks and had
arrived very late. The ex-carpenter’s wife had just finished
showering and now stood before a full-length mirror. Her hips were
swathed in fine linen, her arms left half-bare by a silk-finished
nightgown. She braided her hair and rubbed fine powder and oil
into her tremulous neck. John knelt on the parlor floor, his
…End of the part1. To be continued..

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