Archive for July, 2008

Archive-name Miscellpure-rk100

Saturday, July 5th, 2008

Archive-author: Texas A&M
Archive-title: Purity Test – Roadkill

The reader hereby is warned that roadkill games can be dangerous; not
all that appears dead is dead; not all scents can be removed by normal
means (ie, soap and water); not many of those who are weak of heart or
stomach can truly enjoy roadkill games, and attempt to do so at their
own risk of O’spurt-ing; not all roadkill is suitable for all things
contained herein, and discretion must be used in what one attempts to
do with a given piece of roadkill; not many states have laws
specifically banning roadkill games, but most judges and juries will
not think twice about locking up and throwing away the key on anyone
who can be shown to have participated in roadkill games; roadkill can
carry odd diseases; odd diseases can be passed between two or more
people engaging in roadkill games with the same piece of roadkill; not
all roadkill can be trusted when it says “I have it covered”; not all
roadkill is natural, some roadkill is manufactured and placed on the
road for tourist’s viewing pleasure by local governments (case in
point: the number of armadillos one can see as roadkill on any given
day in Texas far exceeds any estimations of the living population on
the previous day); not all roadkill is suitable for consumption; not
all roadkill will go with “basic black” pumps; not all people consider
roadkill a topic for polite conversation; not all parties can be
livened up by bringing along your own roadkill; not many people
consider roadkill an appropriate housewarming gift; not all roadkill
enjoys being roadkill; not all universities have roadkill
organizations that can tell you where the really good roadkill is and
that can inform you of local laws and customs in the area of roadkill
(start your own, today!); not many hunting magazines consider roadkill
eligible for “best kill” competitions; not many people read all of
these conditions, but all are held to have if they read later portions
of the test, and therefore the authors are not libel in any way,
shape, or form for anything that happens to a reader because of having
read the Omnisex, Roadkill Purity Test, unless of course something
GOOD happens to the reader, in which case we demand 40% off top–
contact the law firm of Grinch, Evil-anti-Grinch and Assoc., College
Station, TX, 77840, for payment instructions.

_______________________________________________________________________________
The Roadkill Purity Test is a blatant plagiarism of the original Purity Test,
and therefore we shall list its history as the history of this test.

Original Style Purity Test Genesis/History:

Version 1 (100) Created at MIT-1@aker House. Two parallel versions; one for
male, and one for female. Not much is known about this
version. It was ported to CMU by ps in 1982.
Version 2 (247) Spring 1983 – CMU/jb, pd, kr, ps, ts, mt, et al.
…End of the part1. To be continued..